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How old should my child be for private music lessons?

As parents, we want the best for our children and we are usually anxious about getting it right.  Here in Park Slope, we all know the competition for preschool, day care and elementary schools begins at birth!

You can usually get a sense of your child’s interest in music by around the age of 2 or 3.  They will be singing along with songs in the car or asking you to play a certain song over and over again.   And at some point, they may even ask you,

“Can I learn to play ____?(guitar, piano, flute or whatever).

So when should we start getting our kids into a private music lesson?

As a private music teacher and parent, I recommend the following.

Try out a mommy-and-me type class first. 

My son enjoyed the Music Together classes on the corner of 1st street and 6th avenue though he was usually more interested in putting away the instruments than actually participating!  We also had a lovely time with Juguemos A Cantar, a Spanish language program that includes lots of music and playtime.

There are so many sing-along programs available where general exposure to music,  singing and dancing take place in a group environment.  This is great for toddlers from 6 months to around 3 years old.

Listen To Music In The Home

This seems rather common sense, but you can definitely expose your child to some great stuff.  Be sure to try and include a variety of music.  Also, be aware that certain music and lyrics may not be age-appropriate the same way you do with movies and television.   Folk and classical music are good choices for toddlers.

Take Your Children to See Live Music

Seeing and hearing live instruments is an amazingly different experience than just listening to recordings.  And, because so much of our listening experience is now mediated through compressed audio via streaming services, we really miss out on the true experience of sound.   All the major music institutions in our fine city have programs for children.  PS 321 has long been hosting a wonderful series of concerts for children organized by Simone Dinnerstein, a world renown classical pianist.  Carnegie Hall, Lincoln Center, BAM and don’t forget the fine performances of students at Juilliard, NYU, Mannes and Manhattan School of Music.  We have no excuse!

Fine Motor Skills

By around the age of 3 1/2 or 4 years, most children have developed fine motor skills to the point where they can write their name legibly.  They may be able to spell it forwards and backwards.  They usually can say the alphabet in proper sequence.  And, they usually start to develop the ability to focus on one activity for a longer period of time, say 5 to 10 minutes.  At this point, we can start to work with a child on piano /keyboard.

Why start with piano/keyboard?

The piano is a very visually and logically designed interface.   It doesn’t require a lot of technical exertion to produce a pleasing sound.  Modern digital keyboards can fit into any sized apartment and have volume controls as well as headphone outputs!   (We have some recommendations here.)

By starting with the piano/keyboard, we can also visually explain abstract concepts of music like pitch being high or low, and the relationship between the pitches as spatial relationships between the fingers and keys.  Using a well-design curriculum like the Musicolor Method, we can coax our young preschoolers to producing quite complex and beautiful music in a relatively short period of time.

Why not violin?

Violin, though often touted as a great beginning instrument, has the challenge of no fixed pitch.  It requires tuning and the ability to play in tune – intonation.  This can drive lots of people crazy hearing a squeaking, out of tune Twinkle Twinkle over and over again.  Piano, or digital keyboard, has the advantage of fixed tuning.  An acoustic piano is tuned by a professional once every 6 to 12 months and that’s it.  Parents don’t have to fiddle with the tuners.

Growth mindset and brain development

By starting your child in music lessons at the age of 3 or 4, you are helping them with so many life skills.  There have been so many studies about the positive effects of music on brain development in young children.  And now, further studies are showing the positive effects of participation in formal private music lessons.  These studies are showing that music, above all other activities, fosters the very skills that are needed for success in life.  These skills include focus, persistence, discipline, public performance, practice skills, study skills, problem solving as well as the ability to listen, harmonize and blend with others.

A Focus on Life Skills

It is with this life skills focus that I established Park Slope Music Lessons.   I had studied to be a music teacher at NYU on a special scholarship back in the 1980’s.  However, I was soon pulled into many other adventures of life including becoming a writer, producer and VJ for MTV, back when they still played music.  Teaching music as a full-time focus didn’t happen until my own son began asking for music lessons.  It was then that I started to search for a teacher.  I was surprised that almost no one would accept a 3 or 4 year old student.

They all said “Come back when he was 7 or 8.”

A Homeschool Project Expands

That’s when I started my own homeschooling project that blossomed into both a new curriculum and music school.   Today we have 3 teachers, including myself, two of whom will actually come to your home for lessons.

I hope to work with you and your child one day soon.

By Andrew Ingkavet

Andrew Ingkavet sparks wonder, creativity and growth through music as an educator, author and entrepreneur. Insatiably curious - a polymath with a love of travel, food, and ideas, he uses music to lead us back to our unique authentic selves. Let your truth song resound! Break free of ignorance! Let your inner lion roar!

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